What I've Missed

Looking left and right

I spin and stumble through the night

of discontent and disconnect

the elusive moment lurks,

but not here

that is,

not left or right

I am the frozen balance point

caught between

a direction of moments

staring at the wall

and not the hall

both hands push

the immovable object

blind to the prevailing winds of

the irresistible force

yet

in the quiet fatigue

of forgetting what I know

the left pulses to the right

across my body

revealing an intersection of flow

never that

always this

not left or right

so easy to be dismissed

until you’ve unwound

under the branches of fractured expectations

in the darkest night

the smell of flowing, living mist

this lovely fragrance

is what I’ve missed

one day

we celebrate

as if there is a start

a mistake of dimension

let’s find that river’s present

let’s find that moving heart

under the branches of fractured expectations

in the darkest night

it’s never that

and always this

this is what I’ve missed.

Peace~AEB

Happy new year in every moment!

False Pearls

The negatives are false pearls
flagging their missions 
attracting attention
to the flipside
the marriage of worlds
apart in mind
but whole when unfurled
now just baubles on a dress
tossed in a closet
with the other things
that previously mattered
that made you you
until you hatched 
and brought the naked 
to life
I say thank you to false pearls
to the shells of our world
bejeweled and irrelevant 
revealing the faux
frames the doorway
to truth 

~AEB

Dance with the One Who Brung Ya

When seeking

open your soul

and ask

but accept no

recorded answers

what is the answer to my suffering

is not a question

like in a conversation

asking for a recipe

written on an index card

handed down

by a deity

who first burned a bush

because it was

the lingua franca of some yesterday

and somehow

that's proof

someone knew

but not you

When seeking

open your soul

and ask

but ask like asking for water

from the sky

not expecting an answer

just stating a need

and recognize

your question

is just a blinded angle

of the whole

standing like a sentry

with one-sided eyes

separating and protecting you

from what 

exactly

When seeking

strip yourself naked

recognize

you are still you

without the guise

and while

embracing the whole

something rises

now every wave and body

can intermingle

can carry the music

so you can dance with the one who brung ya

~AEB

Chewing Yesterday

Going through the motions
like I was chewing real food
between zero and one
in a slender envelope of mood

I can’t make out the flavor
extremes are mitigated
by the din
of all these sounds
that sound the same

so
I think I’m in

skipping past emotions
they’re going out of style
driving down the map
east to west to east again

it’ll be a while

sifting through the potions
offered from the start
dizzy, shifting glimmers
perpendicular to the heart

I reach out to touch you
but my hand slides to the side
my fingers feel the coins
with which to ride the ride

my aim seems strange and clumsy
but everyone’s the same
we share a tiny future
inside a tiny frame

I think I may be going
perpendicular to the heart
I’m just going through the motions
I have been from the start

I can’t make out the flavor
but it tastes like
yesterday
~AEB

Mirror Mind

The mirrored mind repeats

words as proof

evidential feats

of existence

of a place, a station

an ordered universe

not gifted with patience

we flash the stars upon the wall

mystery controlled

symbols loop and call

us by name

chaining each brain

perhaps some dice

to shake things up

to think it’s fresh

but that’s the edge

therefore the end

of the party

and repeat

~AEB